Foresight
by Loopy777
Summary: On his way home, Bumi stops to have his fortune told... and have fun messing with people, of course. Written for the Rare/Crack Pairing Fic Exchange.


_Thanks to AvocadoLove for the beta._

**Foresight**

Bumi hadn't predicted that he would meet a fortuneteller on the way home.

To be fair (just this once), the King of Omashu wasn't taking the most direct route back to his city. At the respectable age of 113- which you had to respect because no one in their right mind would actually _enjoy_ being that old (Bumi not withstanding) - he didn't really have the chance to travel anymore, so Bumi decided to take full advantage of his business trip to Ba Sing Se. (He had to say, he very much liked the way kids these days defined 'business.' When he was young, 'business' was sitting at long tables and talking until the most important person in the room fell asleep. This most recent bit of 'business' was a matter of liberating The Impenetrable City from Fire Nation occupation, which was a lot more fun.) Instead of going straight back to work, Bumi accompanied his fellow White Lotus International Grand Masters Jeong-Jeong and Piandao to their old homes in the Fire Nation.

Bumi quite enjoyed the trip, although he wasn't sure that he could say the same for his Lotus Brothers. Granted, Jeong-Jeong didn't look like he enjoyed anything, and Piandao had a bad habit of hiding his real opinions in favor of a detachedly sage facade, so Bumi didn't let that bother him. At least they were all able to enjoy quite a few good Pai Sho games, and Bumi was pleased to say that he won a majority of the matches. (Really, Jeong-Jeong had trouble looking at things sideways, and Piandao seemed more interested in provoking his opponent than beating him.) When they all reached the swordmaster's home island of Shu Jing, only Jeong-Jeong decided to continue on to the Fire Nation capital. Bumi stayed for a week at the Piandao's villa, but the area turned out to be far too sleepy for his tastes, and besides, the swordmaster's butler was too sarcastic to be any fun to mess around with.

So Bumi said his goodbyes, and opted for the long road back to Omashu by taking a ship over to the old Taku ports. It only occurred to the king after he was well on his way that people were probably waiting for him to recreate the bridges over the Gap to get back into his city. Few were the Earthbenders who had that kind of raw power, and most of them were either in Ba Sing Se right now or hanging out with the new Fire Lord and putting her dirty feet on all the furniture. So Bumi made sure he didn't dawdle anywhere, but neither did he hurry back. His subjects were probably enjoying the continued vacation from his antics, heh.

Bumi swung by Pohuai Stronghold to see if the Fire Nation was stilled holed up there, but they had apparently gotten either Crazy Ozai's or Young Zuko's recall orders, so he had been forced to forgo that entertainment. From there Bumi had to travel north, because the war had long ago shut down the Paoshe River ferries, and so the only option was to go around. Along the way, he heard about a popular fortuneteller living in a village named Makapu. They said that she had met the Avatar and given him the winning strategy for defeating the Fire Lord (the old one, not that awkward Zuko lad), and that her predictions were never wrong.

That sounded like fun to Bumi. Fortunetelling was usually amusing, and besides, Bumi wanted to see if she really knew Aang; the Airbender's friends were always interesting.

They said her name was Aunt Wu.

* * *

The village itself wasn't anything to write home about (especially since he was already on his way back and could just tell everyone once he got there), but they did have a fairly unique formation of lava rocks on the East side of the settlement. Bumi was pretty surprised, though, at how little he stood out amongst the inhabitants. Here he was, an old man in a feathered purple robe who walked around barefoot and had a habit of cackling at things that he and no one else found funny, and not one person paid him any special attention. As it turned out, the village had its own share of unusual personalities, including an old man who didn't bathe (and turned out not to be an Earthbender, to Bumi's disappointment), a young man in the most fabulous red shoes that Bumi had ever seen, a girl with up-turned pigtails as tall as the whole rest of her, and a jittery fellow with an unnatural regard for his stock of cabbages (who Bumi thought looked familiar, for some reason).

Perhaps a crazy old man in a purple robe wasn't a big deal around here, after all.

Aunt Wu's house was a fancy-looking, two-storied edifice near the village square. A strangely ageless man with white hair and an expensive black frock attended its doors. Bumi harrumphed. Mister Doorman might be considered fashionable, but the lack of real color offended the king's sensibilities. The man himself ignored Bumi's displeasure, bowed, and gestured at the sliding doors. "Aunt Wu is expecting you."

"Eh? Is she now?"

"Yes."

"Then what's my name? If she's expecting me, she must know my name."

"She neglected to mention it."

"Ha. A _likely_ story. Well, let's say it's true. If the old gal was expecting me, she'd know that I'm hungry, and you'd think that she'd at least have a snack ready for a starving old man."

"The assistant will bring you some bean curd puffs."

"Bah, I don't like them. They get my tummy rumbling."

"My apologies."

"Actually, I'm fine with them. I was just testing you. Seems Aunt Wu didn't know I'd be pretending not to like bean curd puffs, otherwise you would have been ready for my little trick."

"Perhaps, sir. But you'll notice that I didn't have any bean curd puffs on hand."

"Ha! But I was only _pretending_. If she could really see the future, she'd know that I was only pretending, and would have had some ready for me. I'm getting pretty hungry, here."

"It seems, sir, that you have constructed a logical fallacy that cannot help but cast my employer in a bad light."

"Get that often, do you?"

"Several times a week, perhaps."

"Good man! I'll try to have another one ready for you by the time I leave!"

The white-haired man nodded stoically. "I look forward to it, sir."

"Actually, I'm a King, not a Sir. If Aunt Wu-"

"Whatever she may know, your majesty, she neglected to tell me."

"Ha! Good man. Still." Bumi clapped him on the shoulder. "Get that assistant to bring in the puffs, and there will be a good tip for you."

"Of course, your majesty."

The puffs were _quite_ tasty, and Bumi resolved to get the recipe for use in the Royal Omashu Kitchens. He was just about to ask about getting a golden goblet filled with cheap hooch when the old Aunt Wu gal herself emerged from the backroom. "Well, come along, your majesty."

"Monochrome out there gave it away, eh?"

"Please, come inside."

"Hn."

The backroom looked exactly like Bumi would have expected. It was shadowy, lit softly by candles, soft lanterns, and a central fire pit. There were pillows to sit on, and a pot of tea ready for use (presumably for those regular customers who came more for the chitchat than any real supernatural experiences). Bumi preferred to sit in chairs, but since the floor was covered in wood, Earthbending himself something of that nature would have been too upsetting. So he plopped himself down on the green pillow and cackled. "Well, lay it on me, Madame. Will I be rich? I am going to get married soon? Most importantly, are the two going to be related and which one will come first?"

Aunt Wu just smiled. "You're a skeptic?"

Bumi considered. "Well, I wouldn't say that, exactly. As you might expect from a tough-looking old man, I've seen and done a lot, including all those annoying things that can't always be explained. I've met gurus who had real visions about the future, half of which I managed to verify and the other half sounded good enough that I just assumed they were more or less true. You could very well be the real thing, but in that case, I can't help but wonder whose Aunt you are, exactly."

She laughed. "Oh, I haven't thought about that in years. It started with a child, and in time other people adopted it. I just began introducing myself that way out of habit, and it stuck."

"Hn. Well, that was boring. Might as well get on with the predictions, then."

"All right. But, really, what would you like to know? Your robe is too purple and feathery to belong to a poor man, and you already claim to be a king."

"Hmmmmmm." Bumi really had to think about that question. Now that it was brought up, he rarely spent time thinking about the future. Oh, he devoted more than enough brainpower to things that were going to happen, sure enough, but that was just part of the usual planning that he had to do as a king. Probable events, alternative courses, long-term factors and the like weren't really the 'future.' The future was a complete unknown, and as such, not really worth thinking about for Bumi. The future was what you had if you didn't have any goals.

So what were his goals, now? The Fire Nation was defeated, the Avatar was back, and Ba Sing Se had been cleansed of the worst of its corruption. Bumi's most pressing concern was rebuilding and resettling Omashu, which wouldn't require much more than the usual levels of manipulation.

Aunt Wu nodded. "So, you want some direction."

Bumi looked up at her sharply. He didn't even bother trying to hide his interest.

The Fortuneteller reached underneath the pillow she was sitting on, and produced an aged moneybag. "Give me your hand."

She spilled six coins into Bumi's waiting palm. They were an uncommon style, but Bumi recognized them. When a new Avatar was identified at age sixteen, it was common for his or her home nation to send a gift of some kind to the previous nation in the cycle. After Avatar Roku left on his journey to master all the elements, the Fire Lord ordered a certain outstanding monetary debt to the Earth Kingdom be repaid in a very special way. The proper amount of gold was melted down, and cast into many small coins. The intricate carvings on each side were new, designed by one of the Fire Nation's preeminent artists. One side of each coin depicted the face of Avatar Kyoshi at the center of an abstract design that recalled the peak of a mountain, and the other, and the other was a similarly stylized shape like a war-fan.

Although Kyoshi herself never had overly friendly relations with the authorities in Ba Sing Se, the Earth King at the time accepted the coins eagerly, and was known to hand them out as tokens of his favor.

Aunt Wu had _six_, if they were real. Needless to say, such coins were worth quite a bit more than even the gold that they were supposedly cast from.

"Throw the coins into the air," the Fortuneteller whispered. "Away from the fire, now."

Bumi grinned, shook the coins in his cupped hands, and then tossed them up in the space between Aunt Wu and himself. The metal discs bounced and rolled, finally settling with five equally distant from each other, and one coin standing up on edge in the center.

Aunt Wu looked up with an arched eyebrow. "Earthbender, eh?"

"Sorry," Bumi offered with a grin that made the lie clear. It had taken fine control to shift the ground beneath the floorboards just enough to move the coins properly, using only _his toes_, and she wasn't even impressed. There was no helping some people.

A second coin-toss produced a more natural scattering. "Ah, much better." Aunt Wu traced the coins lightly with a finger, connecting them in lines that looked fairly random to Bumi. Soon enough, the Fortuneteller looked up with a smile. "Mm, this is a pleasant future. You will live a while yet, and gain fame beyond even what you already have. You will be valued for your wisdom; many will write and come from far away to consult you on important matters. Your home, which I'll take to be the city-state you rule, will prosper, and know peace for as long as you live."

Bumi allowed himself a yawn. "So, is that it? Well, I guess that's happy enough, but I could have gotten the same thing from any circus charlatan. Nothing in there about who's finally going to kill me?"

"Oh, I don't need coins or bones for that," Aunt Wu came back quickly. "It's as plain as day that the only one who can kill you is yourself."

Bumi couldn't help but grin. "Well, you're observant, I'll give you that. Well, fairly observant. You didn't notice that I nicked one of your coins, but as I haven't left the premises with it, yet, you still have a little time. Or did I just give the game away?"

Aunt Wu didn't do anything but smile politely as she reached for the teapot. She poured two cups, and gave one to Bumi. "I have to say, you don't seem terribly interested in my work. Usually, even skeptics are more invested in what I have to say."

Bumi tried the tea. It was pretty good, but didn't have anything on Grand Lotus Iroh's brews. Still, how fair would it be if the greatest tea-maker in the world was also the world's greatest bean-curd-puff fryer? It would be like being the most powerful Earthebender who ever lived and _also_ a legendary mad genius. Bumi cackled at the thought. "Well, what can I say? I get most of my fun from messing with people, so it really doesn't matter to me if you're a fake or not."

Aunt Wu nodded as if she understood. "You're a smart man, I can tell, but you have fun with it. I bet you have everything _all_ figured out, eh?"

"Well, everything important." Bumi considered for another second. "I'm still not sure if the Avatar's lemur wound up being important, though. I really thought he would be, but the stories I got were rather confused."

Aunt Wu raised an eyebrow at that, but didn't take that bait, either. "I bet you like plans, then."

Bumi looked right into Aunt Wu's eyes. "Do _you_?"

"Me?" A smile tugged at the Fortuneteller's lips. "I have far too much responsibility to make plans. Even for someone who can tell what the future holds, it's dangerous getting too caught up in all the details. I just focus on the important bits, or the parts that might be important someday, and point people in their direction. And then I step back and let Destiny have its say. What more can anyone do, eh?"

The fire crackled in its pit.

Bumi turned a critical eye (the bulging one) on Aunt Wu. She knew her business, it seemed. "Very wise, Fortuneteller. It's a shame you don't play Pai Sho."

"Who has time, in a small town?"

"Quite right! Kingdoms are much easier, since so many ministers want to have their say, and a little of their way on top of it," Bumi laughed. "So, what would you say my _kingdom's_ destiny is, with a mad old ruler like me?"

Aunt Wu finished her tea, and gently put the cup down on the little table at her side. "Throw the coin you still have. If," she added with a growing smirk, "you really did manage to pinch one."

Bumi rolled up one voluminous purple sleeve, made a fist, and then opened it to reveal one of the Kyoshi coins, gleaming in the firelight. "The Avatar taught me that trick, when I was his age."

"Of course." She took it in steady fingers, but didn't turn her gaze on it. Instead, she just held it tightly, using it to complete the circuit between her digits. "You will have the opportunity to decide its fate, and you will choose with wisdom. Also, do not let any cabbage merchants enter the city for a full year from now, or else Omashu will suffer from a blight brought on by a cabbage slug infestation. Other than that, everything will be okay."

Bumi was actually taken aback by that. Soon enough, though, he was cackling again. "Ah, that was refreshingly specific. You can be sure that you'll be hearing from me if I disregard your advice and nothing bad comes of it! I'll be _most_ dissatisfied! Well, as dissatisfied as I can be with a thriving cabbage market in my city. Ha!" He rose to his feet, and gave his arms a bone-popping stretch. "All right, so what do I owe you for the entertainment?"

Aunt Wu waved a disinterested hand. "I don't charge. The village looks after me, and I look after everyone who needs guidance."

"So that means you're a 'fixture of this community,' eh? Because fixtures don't move, so you can't charge at anyone." The silence was that strange flavor of deafening that's never put to the test, on account of no one actually needing their ears since it is, after all, just silence. "Okay, okay, I'm done. Enjoy your life, Madame Aunt Wu."

The White-Haired Monochrome Man got a silver piece on the way out, as well as a logical conundrum regarding why he had to hang around Aunt Wu all day when she should theoretically be able to tell him down to the minute when he would be needed and when he would be free to pursue his own interests. (Mister Monochrome took this with his customary stoicism.)

On his way out of the village, Bumi spotted a younger old man in blue robes and an interesting hat. The relatively younger man was merely walking along on some kind of business, but he radiated an easy contentment with the world and everything in it. "So," Bumi asked him, "what do you think? Is Aunt Wu for realsies?"

The man smiled. "She hasn't been wrong yet. Awful nice, knowing your future."

"Is it?" Bumi thoughtfully stroked the tuffet of white hair that sprouted from his chin. "I suppose it can be, if you're careful with it. Rather like a sword, eh? Or owning a kingdom!" The king began cackling wildly at the thought, to the younger old man's confusion.

Bumi summoned an Earthbending surfboard with a thrust of his fists, and was back on the road in an instant.

* * *

Time passed and many things changed, but the Earth stayed under everyone's feet where it belonged.

As thick as the refined stone walls were in Omashu's Royal Palace, some of the doors in the residential wing were still old-fashioned wood, and someone with a good ear could hear voices coming right through them. This was only worrying when no one was talking but you were hearing the voices anyway, but Bumi hadn't yet reached that point. To be honest, he had figured his ears would go long before (the rest of) his sanity did.

He hadn't expected his life to go before anything else.

Through the door to his bedroom, Bumi heard the rather redundant guard whose job it was to make sure no one interrupted the King of Omashu's beauty sleep. Or natural death. Whichever came first. The fellow was young, but no so young that his voice should still have that high-pitched squeaky quality. Even so, he was a guard in the palace and an Earthbender, so it wasn't likely that anyone felt the need to dwell on the failings of his voice. "The king is at rest. What business does the visitor have?"

Actually, the king was lying around in his deathbed, hoping for some entertainment while he wasted away, but the spoken challenge was a good way to get the visitor talking about his or her self, so Bumi didn't contradict it.

"Oh, my name is Aunt Wu, son. I'm a Fortuneteller, here to attend the king."

The Squeaky Guard didn't sound happy. "You brought this traveler to the king's room without sending word? What's gotten into you?"

Another voice spoke, and while it was obviously that of another guard, Bumi didn't recognize it. Must be someone who works outside the palace, then; Bumi hadn't been able to get out and go slide-sledding in a year, making it hard to meet all the new faces in the city. "She's _really_ a Fortuneteller, sir. The things she knows… I thought the king would want to know about it right away!"

Oh, dear. It was a good thing for this new guy that Bumi wouldn't be around much longer, because he would have to come down hard on people who let superstitions interfere with their jobs. After all, if all it took to get inside the palace was some fancy talk and a few tricks, then it wouldn't be long before a complete nut swindled himself the throne itself and seized control of the city.

Come to think of it, that sounded familiar.

Before Squeaky Guard could talk again, Bumi took a deep breath and shouted. "Go ahead and send her in, boys! Aunt Wu and I are old friends! We only met each other once, but we were both pretty old when it happened, so it still counts."

"Your majesty!" The door opened and the Fortuneteller herself was ushered in. The guards remained outside.

"So, Madame Aunt Wu, long time no see. I'd get up, but I'm dying. For realsies."

"I know." The Fortuneteller had, unlike Bumi himself, aged gracefully. There were more wrinkles, and her hair was now as white as polished bone, but she stood straight even as she leaned on a cane, and her eyes were still clear and strong. "Do you remember what I prophesied for you?"

"Okay, okay, I admit it. I kept all the cabbages out, like you said, and for more than just the one year. Not that I necessarily believe in that kind of stuff, mind. No one really thought it was that odd, because as King I've long taken a strong interest in the diets of my subjects, but it was still a risk. And to be honest, too much cabbage gives me-"

"I meant the part about the city as your legacy." Her smile was warm but gentle, like the fire pit in her old chamber. "But I'm glad the warning about the slug worked out, too."

"So, the time has come to choose the fate of Omashu after I'm gone, and you've come to make sure I get your prediction right and do it with whatever wisdom I can summon up?"

"Oh, I don't have to make sure of anything." At this, Aunt Wu actually shrunk a little, letting the world bend her back just a bit. "I've come to witness, dear. And to help. It will be tonight, you see."

"Oh." Bumi tried, with all his brainpower, to come up with a tease that would play off of that, but for some reason, his mad genius wasn't working. "I _do_ have plans, you know. I never had kids, so I had to come up with a test that would weed out the undesirables. The ones who wouldn't listen to the Earth, and who wouldn't have the brains and the will to control a city like this."

Aunt Wu just looked on, not unkindly.

Bumi continued, "The Earth King doesn't even know what goes on in his city, but I've kept track of everything here. I've kept Omashu strong during all the years of war, and made it weak right when it needed to be. I kept the people safe, and if I messed with their minds a little bit here and there, it was only to keep things fun." The King of Omashu smiled. "I took care of everyone, and they took care of me."

Aunt Wu nodded. "It's best when it works out that way. Everything was just the way you wanted it."

His eyes sought out hers. "Including this. How did you know I wanted you here? Did you catch the rumors of the dying king, and hurry over to make sure things worked out the way you said?"

"That would probably be easier for you to believe."

Bumi nodded. "Can you stay long? I've been running this place for forever, and they'll be upset without someone in charge."

Aunt Wu nodded again. "I can manage it. I only chose Makapu village because I liked it, not because I couldn't do better."

"Good." Bumi sighed. "Then I guess I'm asking you to keep things okay, while we wait for the new king or queen to rise."

Aunt Wu nodded one final time. "I already answered you, your majesty."

"Thanks, Fortuneteller."

The next day, Bumi was gone, and Aunt Wu looked towards the future.

**END**


End file.
